Online Dating
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I'm completely jaded now as my experiences with women on dating sites has left me terrified of them in real life. How am I ever going to meet anybody if I'm convinced that I'm too ugly for anybody to the point where I literally ( as in literally literally) don't have the courage to even look at them in the street?0
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I met a bunch of nice guys at a bike event Sunday - so much less pressure than online encounters.0
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I went on several online originated dates this week. As long as I represent myself properly and she does as well then no problems. I haven't found what women call "sparkle" yet but this time around it is a much better experience. I think that last time I was looking for instant gratification via modern technology. I've grown up a bit since I decided to just be single for three years and date myself.
Now, I am able to objectively weed out the bad matches (Crazy pics= crazy chicks). I have some optimism that this might work. If it doesn't I can't really blame the method.
I have figured out a few things that tip me off on profiles and my "Cradar is preforming well.
1. If she has pics with her infant child, she is not savvy enough to look out for the safety of her child nor does she respect the other parent.
2. If she flips off the camera and drops the F-bomb along with challenges in her profile....nope.
3. If she is my age and every single pic is her holding a drink at a bar................nope.
4. If she is posing in all of her pics with random men I assume ex's.
5. If she responds to my intro message within ten seconds I assume desperate.
6. If her post contains any of the following: OMG, ROFL, LOL, HMU. DTF.......it's a nope.
7. I am not skinny by any means , In fact I am just getting down to where I am overweight, but when an overweight girl demands that anyone who is interested in her be "athletic with abs", I chuckle a bit.
8. Neck tats, face tats, any tats with gang symbols..........................................nope.
9. Anyone who will only date a specific race. I understand attraction, but advertising closed mindedness is a turn off for me.......it's a nope.
10. If I get that weird vibe, I no longer ignore it because of a physical attraction. Something is amiss and I don't want to find out what.
Please understand I know that these same observations are just as true for men on the sites. I just only date women so my experience is with them. Guys can be just as weird if not weirder and probably more dangerous.
I always meet in public on the first few dates.
I always make sure we have separate transport.
I always make sure I keep my private info private until I figure out to what capacity I want this person in my life.
Nobody meets my child until she is intended to be permanent, therefore no one has met my child.
I am looking for as potential partner not any more associates or friends, so when friends is suggested I politely decline unless we have mutual friends or interests. I have only made one friend this way and she will be around forever I hope.
Good luck out there.0 -
I just deleted my online dating accounts. I tried POF, MeetMe, and OK Cupid. They all had the same results. I would either get messages from 50 year old married men looking to explore their sexuality and spice up their otherwise boring marriage, or I would get messaged by wannabe plays who were like "Hey girl DTF (Down To *kitten*)". I think I met one person who actually had a normal conversation strategy but even that only lasted one or two messages. Most of the guys that were on those sites seemed like they should be on those sites. I didnt go on a single date because it never got that far. Never again.0
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It seems better if we return to the traditional modalities for dating.0
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I haven't had a super terrible experience yet but I haven't met the right person either
sad panda 0 -
PowerKickChic wrote: »I met my husband online BUT I realize we are the exception, not the rule. We met the same day we contacted each other via email/dating site because no matter what anyone says, you really don't know someone until you meet them in person(even on skype). Body reactions and vibes are sooo important.
We were engaged a week later and married less than a year after that. We will have our 15th wedding anniversary next January
Don't give up hope
You got engaged after a week?
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PowerKickChic wrote: »I met my husband online BUT I realize we are the exception, not the rule. We met the same day we contacted each other via email/dating site because no matter what anyone says, you really don't know someone until you meet them in person(even on skype). Body reactions and vibes are sooo important.
We were engaged a week later and married less than a year after that. We will have our 15th wedding anniversary next January
Don't give up hope
You got engaged after a week?
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Markdjones83 wrote: »PowerKickChic wrote: »I met my husband online BUT I realize we are the exception, not the rule. We met the same day we contacted each other via email/dating site because no matter what anyone says, you really don't know someone until you meet them in person(even on skype). Body reactions and vibes are sooo important.
We were engaged a week later and married less than a year after that. We will have our 15th wedding anniversary next January
Don't give up hope
You got engaged after a week?
Oh *kitten* I missed that part.... A WEEK!!!!! "BUT I realize we are the exception, not the rule. " You watch the movie "Hes just not into you alot dont you"
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Just not into you??0
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He spent the WHOLE time talking about his EX and then he told me he had felony burglary charge against him for going into her house when she wasn't home and checking her facebook. I ran for the hills!0
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dawn_noelle29 wrote: »He spent the WHOLE time talking about his EX and then he told me he had felony burglary charge against him for going into her house when she wasn't home and checking her facebook. I ran for the hills!
Holy crap, nightmare!0 -
Markdjones83 wrote: »Just not into you??
"She is the exception not the rule" is a quote made famous by the chick flick "Hes just not that into you"...
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Had a wonderful few dates until we simultaneously realized we hated one another deeply, passionately and on a fundamental level.0
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HumboldtFred wrote: »Had a wonderful few dates until we simultaneously realized we hated one another deeply, passionately and on a fundamental level.
LOL, I'd love to hear the story on this one!
Never had any that were run for the hills awful. Did happen to meet this one guy on OKC who I really enjoyed our conversation. We decided to meet up at a halfway point, but at the last minute, he asked if I could head the 25 or so miles over to his city so we could have a picnic and go for a stroll around the park. By this romantic picnic/stroll, it appeared he actually meant for me to come over to his HOUSE and walk around the neighborhood and then eat leftovers.. that his parents had made.. at what was actually his parents' house.
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Oh, and I should add we didn't have any stimulating conversation after that because he ended up playing video games the entire time after we ate. Didn't walk me to my car or anything.
Other than that, online dating was never awful but I never met "the one" there.0 -
Reading through this thread makes me glad I'm okay with being single. I attempted online dating in my early twenties but I'd mostly get messages from people who a)wrot lik dis n thoght id wnt 2 slep wit dem, b)were at least 20 years older, super creepy and most likely married, or my personal favourite c)thought black girls were hot and just saw me as a fetish. The conversations usually started (and ended) like "hey I think black girls are hot/ I've never been with a black girl before"
And the amount of male junk pictures I used to get back then
Now I wisely spend my time using the internet for what it was made for - watching cat videos on youtube and reading random articles on wikipedia
I love this response!! It's awesome! 0 -
Oh, and I should add we didn't have any stimulating conversation after that because he ended up playing video games the entire time after we ate. Didn't walk me to my car or anything.
Other than that, online dating was never awful but I never met "the one" there.
LOL really. I know some people like that who would ignore there gf calling while playing video games. Then pretend to be sleeping when calling her back.
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soldiergrl_101 wrote: »Markdjones83 wrote: »Just not into you??
"She is the exception not the rule" is a quote made famous by the chick flick "Hes just not that into you"...
Ah, chick flicks....like this
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I agreed to meet up with a guy about 40 minutes away at a TGI Fridays for a drink and appetizers. I showed up in an adorable outfit and 3" heels (I'm 5;5"). He showed up and was only 5'2"... I have NO height issues about my mate, but apparently he DID! We met in the parking lot and he asked me to wait five minutes before I came in, so he would already be seated at the bar and no one would notice our height difference. We had to leave the same way, too! WTF?!0
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