Confession Time! ((ABSOLUTELY NO JUDGEMENT))

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Replies

  • Francl27 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    pofoster21 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    Talkradio wrote: »
    These last few days of being sad have been pretty revealing about my unhealthy relationship with food... I just want to eat until I don't feel anything but full. The lifelong habit of medicating with food is lurking around me. I didn't log the last couple of days, and I know I probably ate over maintenance, but I'm happy that I managed to avoid sitting on the couch and eating bags (plural...) of chips and cookies.

    Back on track today. Even if everything else is haywire, I am going to be kind to myself and not eat until I feel sick.

    This is something I am currently going through myself. My MIL is very ill and it looks like they may not be able to do anything for her. I am close to her as I lost my own mom when I was 26. So I am somewhat self medicating with food and trying to stop myself from doing that at the same time. I didn't log at all yesterday, but I am trying to do better today and deal with the emotions another.

    I am struggling with this myself over my horse. While that may not seem as sad and traumatic as a human this guy is the love of my life. I am just grateful I can spend some quality time with him in the last few weeks of his life. I am grazing him right now. But when I leave I will want to eat and drink to fill the sad places. Some days I resist. And some I don't then have that guilt and disgust with myself to deal with too. But I think we have to forgive ourselves and just keep moving forward. I do believe in the phrase that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

    Thanks @pofoster21, I understand how you feel about your big guy. I recently lost my youngest mastiff too. He was five years old. Our babies in their own way.

    I tear up just thinking that my cat turned 14 and probably doesn't have many years left. She's a pain in the butt but she's been with me since my divorce, and moved to the US with me. I've known her longer than my husband! And she's totally MY cat, always following me, waiting for me to go to bed etc. So yeah, I totally get it.
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    bkhamill wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Tomorrow I will be in training all day. This makes me sad for 3 reasons.

    1. I have no idea what we'll be served for lunch so I can't log it accurately.
    2. I won't be able to be on here at all.
    3. Since I do my HIIT at my office, I'll be missing tomorrow's workout.

    I am, however, looking forward to being out of the office for the day and getting paid for it, also...FREE LUNCH!!! B)

    Cute Avatar

    Thanks! It is pretty much my personality. I DON'T SHARE CAKE!

    Except with me, cuz we're zombie killin' partners... :D

    I feel the need for a real confession today. - I used to shoplift in high school. A LOT. I had a shoplifting partner and we would go together and keep an eye out for the other. I lifted everything, bikinis, movies (VHS, that's how old I am), clothes, makeup, purses, whatever. We got chased out of the mall by security once. We ran through the back hallways where the public isn't supposed to go and exited out some little side door. I never got caught. My partner did, later, after she moved to another state and got put in jail and charged with a felony. - Irony...I've been a cop for over 18 years now. But I can spot a shoplifter in a heartbeat LOL

    Ok this is totally awesome. Living proof that people change!
    Kalici wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Today I had some delicious Ben & Jerry's ice cream after stopping in a bookstore. I didn't find the book I was looking for (Ancillary Sword), so I ended up going home and placing an online order for three books. Can't wait to check em out!

    ALSO, a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! All of my grades have come in, except for one I was never worried about, and I am officially graduating University!! Now I can hopefully get my butt in gear and focus more on this! So relieved.

    Congrats!!!
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    Confession: I will use the same k-cup 2-3 times. lol

    Worst confession I've read here, ewwwwwww. I loathe weak coffee...I'm the one who likes the cup from the bottom of the french press that's practically strong enough to stand up on its own.

    But that leads to a confession that I do put a splash of cold water in my super-strong coffee to cool it down for maximum immediate gulbability, and that grosses most people out too.

    I am such a wuss with hot foods/drinks so sometimes if I want to drink my tea sooner I will add in an ice cube or two. Otherwise I have to wait like 15 minutes to be able to sip it.
    I love my coffee (tea, too, but to a lesser extent) to be piping hot. The second it cools down, gets lukewarm, it almost disgusts me. I can't bring myself to finish it sometimes. At least the kcups I use. The thing is, I like iced coffee a lot.

    I love hot food. But now it's sounding a lot less appetizing in the summery heat we've been getting.

    I have a very sensitive mouth. Just last week I had strips of skin falling off because I burned it yet again with a piece of pizza... I often just end up dropping an ice cube in my coffee when I order some somewhere, lol.

    Stressful morning today and I just gave up on making the kids school lunches. Got my husband to do it. So sick of never knowing what to make for my daughter and I know she won't eat it anyway. Gosh.

    And I have absolutely no idea what *I* want for lunch, so I guess I'm a bit of an hypocrite.

    Holy crap, I hope your mouth is okay now.

    You'd be surprised how fast mouth wounds heal. I'm used to it by now. I always burn it...

    Oh, wow - she's truly your life companion! I'd be in the same boat you are: always worried, but know it will happen sooner or later. You've given her quite a life though!
  • Yes to the spicy/salty/crunchy! I keep a bottle of hot sauce on my desk at work.
  • Laurend224 wrote: »
    jemhh wrote: »
    Laurend224 wrote: »
    jdhcm2006 wrote: »
    Girl Scout Cookies? I'm guessing a fund raiser like our "Bob A Job"?

    qqvkqz669pqy.png

    The thin mints are the best! I was going to buy some from a woman I go to pole class with, but she stopped coming to class. I guess that's a good thing, b/c I can do some damage with those things!

    Give me your address...I'll mail you some...*evil cackle*

    I have 2 cases of thin mints in my bedroom closet. I ordered them when I thought they were going to be vegan, but we got last year's leftovers. I haven't decided whether to sell them or just dole them out to the kids for lunch snacks.

    According to my info they are vegan...or were last year's leftovers not?

    My daughter is selling them and that has been the big question--did they change the recipe or have Thin Mints always been vegan?

    No, it's a new recipe. Last year's cookies have whey in them.

    It is actually more complicated than that... It depends on where you live and who your GS get their cookies from. If you get them from ABC company then they have been vegan for a while. If you get cookies from the Little Brownie Bakers the recipe is new this year. This is very upsetting because I don't like the ABC company thin mints and I found a GS in a different district to buy from and now this!

    I'm now realizing I take thin mints too seriously :/
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    pofoster21 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    Talkradio wrote: »
    These last few days of being sad have been pretty revealing about my unhealthy relationship with food... I just want to eat until I don't feel anything but full. The lifelong habit of medicating with food is lurking around me. I didn't log the last couple of days, and I know I probably ate over maintenance, but I'm happy that I managed to avoid sitting on the couch and eating bags (plural...) of chips and cookies.

    Back on track today. Even if everything else is haywire, I am going to be kind to myself and not eat until I feel sick.

    This is something I am currently going through myself. My MIL is very ill and it looks like they may not be able to do anything for her. I am close to her as I lost my own mom when I was 26. So I am somewhat self medicating with food and trying to stop myself from doing that at the same time. I didn't log at all yesterday, but I am trying to do better today and deal with the emotions another.

    I am struggling with this myself over my horse. While that may not seem as sad and traumatic as a human this guy is the love of my life. I am just grateful I can spend some quality time with him in the last few weeks of his life. I am grazing him right now. But when I leave I will want to eat and drink to fill the sad places. Some days I resist. And some I don't then have that guilt and disgust with myself to deal with too. But I think we have to forgive ourselves and just keep moving forward. I do believe in the phrase that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

    Thanks @pofoster21, I understand how you feel about your big guy. I recently lost my youngest mastiff too. He was five years old. Our babies in their own way.

    I tear up just thinking that my cat turned 14 and probably doesn't have many years left. She's a pain in the butt but she's been with me since my divorce, and moved to the US with me. I've known her longer than my husband! And she's totally MY cat, always following me, waiting for me to go to bed etc. So yeah, I totally get it.
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    bkhamill wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Tomorrow I will be in training all day. This makes me sad for 3 reasons.

    1. I have no idea what we'll be served for lunch so I can't log it accurately.
    2. I won't be able to be on here at all.
    3. Since I do my HIIT at my office, I'll be missing tomorrow's workout.

    I am, however, looking forward to being out of the office for the day and getting paid for it, also...FREE LUNCH!!! B)

    Cute Avatar

    Thanks! It is pretty much my personality. I DON'T SHARE CAKE!

    Except with me, cuz we're zombie killin' partners... :D

    I feel the need for a real confession today. - I used to shoplift in high school. A LOT. I had a shoplifting partner and we would go together and keep an eye out for the other. I lifted everything, bikinis, movies (VHS, that's how old I am), clothes, makeup, purses, whatever. We got chased out of the mall by security once. We ran through the back hallways where the public isn't supposed to go and exited out some little side door. I never got caught. My partner did, later, after she moved to another state and got put in jail and charged with a felony. - Irony...I've been a cop for over 18 years now. But I can spot a shoplifter in a heartbeat LOL

    Ok this is totally awesome. Living proof that people change!
    Kalici wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Today I had some delicious Ben & Jerry's ice cream after stopping in a bookstore. I didn't find the book I was looking for (Ancillary Sword), so I ended up going home and placing an online order for three books. Can't wait to check em out!

    ALSO, a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! All of my grades have come in, except for one I was never worried about, and I am officially graduating University!! Now I can hopefully get my butt in gear and focus more on this! So relieved.

    Congrats!!!
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    Confession: I will use the same k-cup 2-3 times. lol

    Worst confession I've read here, ewwwwwww. I loathe weak coffee...I'm the one who likes the cup from the bottom of the french press that's practically strong enough to stand up on its own.

    But that leads to a confession that I do put a splash of cold water in my super-strong coffee to cool it down for maximum immediate gulbability, and that grosses most people out too.

    I am such a wuss with hot foods/drinks so sometimes if I want to drink my tea sooner I will add in an ice cube or two. Otherwise I have to wait like 15 minutes to be able to sip it.
    I love my coffee (tea, too, but to a lesser extent) to be piping hot. The second it cools down, gets lukewarm, it almost disgusts me. I can't bring myself to finish it sometimes. At least the kcups I use. The thing is, I like iced coffee a lot.

    I love hot food. But now it's sounding a lot less appetizing in the summery heat we've been getting.

    I have a very sensitive mouth. Just last week I had strips of skin falling off because I burned it yet again with a piece of pizza... I often just end up dropping an ice cube in my coffee when I order some somewhere, lol.

    Stressful morning today and I just gave up on making the kids school lunches. Got my husband to do it. So sick of never knowing what to make for my daughter and I know she won't eat it anyway. Gosh.

    And I have absolutely no idea what *I* want for lunch, so I guess I'm a bit of an hypocrite.

    Holy crap, I hope your mouth is okay now.

    You'd be surprised how fast mouth wounds heal. I'm used to it by now. I always burn it...

    Oh, wow - she's truly your life companion! I'd be in the same boat you are: always worried, but know it will happen sooner or later. You've given her quite a life though!

    I raised my baby (a cat) from the time I found her starving and abandoned at around 4 weeks old at a nursery I was working at. She was so small that I could hold her in the palm of my hand and she wouldn't dangle off of either side of my hand.

    She thought I was her mother and HATES everyone else--She'll claw and bite and scratch everyone except me. I can pretty much get away with anything with her. Fast forward three years later, when I was getting married and moving to another country...

    ...I paid around 3000 U.S. dollars to bring her from Oman (my birth country) to Saudi Arabia. After paying the huge amount and bringing her, we found out that my husband is horribly allergic to cats. He almost literally becomes comatose around them--he can't function at all from the crazy-bad reaction he gets. I cried so much about having to give her up for adoption at that point--and instead of agreeing to giving her up for adoption, he offered to let me pay ANOTHER 2000+ USD just so I could send her back to my sister, so I wouldn't have to give her up.

    In other news, I have a seriously awesome husband. ;) I still miss my baby, though. :'(
  • kbmnurse wrote: »
    I still sneak a smoke once in a awhile. UGGGG I know

    I'd love to have a smoke now and then! I'm jealous. I'm so scared I'll want to start smoking regularly again....but I really miss the feeling of stress relief that went with it...and a bit of a rebel feel! ha ha.
  • MoHousdon wrote: »
    bkhamill wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Tomorrow I will be in training all day. This makes me sad for 3 reasons.

    1. I have no idea what we'll be served for lunch so I can't log it accurately.
    2. I won't be able to be on here at all.
    3. Since I do my HIIT at my office, I'll be missing tomorrow's workout.

    I am, however, looking forward to being out of the office for the day and getting paid for it, also...FREE LUNCH!!! B)

    Cute Avatar

    Thanks! It is pretty much my personality. I DON'T SHARE CAKE!

    Except with me, cuz we're zombie killin' partners... :D

    I feel the need for a real confession today. - I used to shoplift in high school. A LOT. I had a shoplifting partner and we would go together and keep an eye out for the other. I lifted everything, bikinis, movies (VHS, that's how old I am), clothes, makeup, purses, whatever. We got chased out of the mall by security once. We ran through the back hallways where the public isn't supposed to go and exited out some little side door. I never got caught. My partner did, later, after she moved to another state and got put in jail and charged with a felony. - Irony...I've been a cop for over 18 years now. But I can spot a shoplifter in a heartbeat LOL

    When I was a kid I went through a stint of stealing money from my parents. I started out small and worked up to $20s. I actually used to go into their bedroom when the we're sleeping and do it. I was 6-8 so was clueless. They eventually caught on and shamed me in front of my siblings by threatening to punish everyone if the guilty party didn't confess. I never did it again.

    My mom told me years later she just thought it was a cry for attention. She was probably right. I also smoked at like 8. Set the bathroom garbage can on fire and then never did that again. I was a total badass until like 10. Then became the model daughter and never drank or smoked or ran around or dated. Boring teenager. I guess I got it all out in the pre-pubescent years. I am a boring adult too.
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    xMrBunglex wrote: »
    My co-worker in the next cube is sick...she has been coughing up a lung for 2 days. I told her "You shouldn't be here, go home!" but she just shrugged. Why do some people insist on coming to work & pumping out the germs???

    (I don't want to be rude, but sorry, she's one of these quite large unhealthy people that will end up being sick for a month.)

    Maybe I'll turn it into a positive & call in sick on Monday and blame it on her! (Assuming I don't, you know, ACTUALLY GET SICK)

    There's a guy at my gym that is there the same time I am every day and he runs on the treadmill. For the past two weeks he's been doing the same thing: sounds like he's trying to cough up a lung. On the treadmill. Not very smart.

    This time of year, if I saw that, I would assume it's allergies. Whenever the freakin' cottonwood trees start blooming, I'm a mess. Not sick, but you would think I was. Coughing and sneezing...

    That's true. For me, I'm not so concerned about the germ factor. I very rarely get sick. I'm just very sensitive to noises and I HATE the incessant coughing sound! Yes, I have my ear buds in, but still.

    Oh, and I wore my brand new purple JBL yurbuds yesterday! So far so good. We'll see how long these last before I kill them with my sweat.
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    pofoster21 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    Talkradio wrote: »
    These last few days of being sad have been pretty revealing about my unhealthy relationship with food... I just want to eat until I don't feel anything but full. The lifelong habit of medicating with food is lurking around me. I didn't log the last couple of days, and I know I probably ate over maintenance, but I'm happy that I managed to avoid sitting on the couch and eating bags (plural...) of chips and cookies.

    Back on track today. Even if everything else is haywire, I am going to be kind to myself and not eat until I feel sick.

    This is something I am currently going through myself. My MIL is very ill and it looks like they may not be able to do anything for her. I am close to her as I lost my own mom when I was 26. So I am somewhat self medicating with food and trying to stop myself from doing that at the same time. I didn't log at all yesterday, but I am trying to do better today and deal with the emotions another.

    I am struggling with this myself over my horse. While that may not seem as sad and traumatic as a human this guy is the love of my life. I am just grateful I can spend some quality time with him in the last few weeks of his life. I am grazing him right now. But when I leave I will want to eat and drink to fill the sad places. Some days I resist. And some I don't then have that guilt and disgust with myself to deal with too. But I think we have to forgive ourselves and just keep moving forward. I do believe in the phrase that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

    Thanks @pofoster21, I understand how you feel about your big guy. I recently lost my youngest mastiff too. He was five years old. Our babies in their own way.

    I tear up just thinking that my cat turned 14 and probably doesn't have many years left. She's a pain in the butt but she's been with me since my divorce, and moved to the US with me. I've known her longer than my husband! And she's totally MY cat, always following me, waiting for me to go to bed etc. So yeah, I totally get it.
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    bkhamill wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Tomorrow I will be in training all day. This makes me sad for 3 reasons.

    1. I have no idea what we'll be served for lunch so I can't log it accurately.
    2. I won't be able to be on here at all.
    3. Since I do my HIIT at my office, I'll be missing tomorrow's workout.

    I am, however, looking forward to being out of the office for the day and getting paid for it, also...FREE LUNCH!!! B)

    Cute Avatar

    Thanks! It is pretty much my personality. I DON'T SHARE CAKE!

    Except with me, cuz we're zombie killin' partners... :D

    I feel the need for a real confession today. - I used to shoplift in high school. A LOT. I had a shoplifting partner and we would go together and keep an eye out for the other. I lifted everything, bikinis, movies (VHS, that's how old I am), clothes, makeup, purses, whatever. We got chased out of the mall by security once. We ran through the back hallways where the public isn't supposed to go and exited out some little side door. I never got caught. My partner did, later, after she moved to another state and got put in jail and charged with a felony. - Irony...I've been a cop for over 18 years now. But I can spot a shoplifter in a heartbeat LOL

    Ok this is totally awesome. Living proof that people change!
    Kalici wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Today I had some delicious Ben & Jerry's ice cream after stopping in a bookstore. I didn't find the book I was looking for (Ancillary Sword), so I ended up going home and placing an online order for three books. Can't wait to check em out!

    ALSO, a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! All of my grades have come in, except for one I was never worried about, and I am officially graduating University!! Now I can hopefully get my butt in gear and focus more on this! So relieved.

    Congrats!!!
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    Confession: I will use the same k-cup 2-3 times. lol

    Worst confession I've read here, ewwwwwww. I loathe weak coffee...I'm the one who likes the cup from the bottom of the french press that's practically strong enough to stand up on its own.

    But that leads to a confession that I do put a splash of cold water in my super-strong coffee to cool it down for maximum immediate gulbability, and that grosses most people out too.

    I am such a wuss with hot foods/drinks so sometimes if I want to drink my tea sooner I will add in an ice cube or two. Otherwise I have to wait like 15 minutes to be able to sip it.
    I love my coffee (tea, too, but to a lesser extent) to be piping hot. The second it cools down, gets lukewarm, it almost disgusts me. I can't bring myself to finish it sometimes. At least the kcups I use. The thing is, I like iced coffee a lot.

    I love hot food. But now it's sounding a lot less appetizing in the summery heat we've been getting.

    I have a very sensitive mouth. Just last week I had strips of skin falling off because I burned it yet again with a piece of pizza... I often just end up dropping an ice cube in my coffee when I order some somewhere, lol.

    Stressful morning today and I just gave up on making the kids school lunches. Got my husband to do it. So sick of never knowing what to make for my daughter and I know she won't eat it anyway. Gosh.

    And I have absolutely no idea what *I* want for lunch, so I guess I'm a bit of an hypocrite.

    Holy crap, I hope your mouth is okay now.

    You'd be surprised how fast mouth wounds heal. I'm used to it by now. I always burn it...

    Oh, wow - she's truly your life companion! I'd be in the same boat you are: always worried, but know it will happen sooner or later. You've given her quite a life though!

    I raised my baby (a cat) from the time I found her starving and abandoned at around 4 weeks old at a nursery I was working at. She was so small that I could hold her in the palm of my hand and she wouldn't dangle off of either side of my hand.

    She thought I was her mother and HATES everyone else--She'll claw and bite and scratch everyone except me. I can pretty much get away with anything with her. Fast forward three years later, when I was getting married and moving to another country...

    ...I paid around 3000 U.S. dollars to bring her from Oman (my birth country) to Saudi Arabia. After paying the huge amount and bringing her, we found out that my husband is horribly allergic to cats. He almost literally becomes comatose around them--he can't function at all from the crazy-bad reaction he gets. I cried so much about having to give her up for adoption at that point--and instead of agreeing to giving her up for adoption, he offered to let me pay ANOTHER 2000+ USD just so I could send her back to my sister, so I wouldn't have to give her up.

    In other news, I have a seriously awesome husband. ;) I still miss my baby, though. :'(

    Aww that would be so hard. I'm sorry.
  • I hit the 35lb pound loss mark today and I am thinking about celebrating with nachos and cheese!

    Great job! Not to be all preachy, but maybe celebrate with something non-food related, too? I mean, enjoy your nachos for sure. Just add in something else so that your mind starts to relate health and weight loss to other good things, too. JMHO.
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    xMrBunglex wrote: »
    My co-worker in the next cube is sick...she has been coughing up a lung for 2 days. I told her "You shouldn't be here, go home!" but she just shrugged. Why do some people insist on coming to work & pumping out the germs???

    (I don't want to be rude, but sorry, she's one of these quite large unhealthy people that will end up being sick for a month.)

    Maybe I'll turn it into a positive & call in sick on Monday and blame it on her! (Assuming I don't, you know, ACTUALLY GET SICK)

    There's a guy at my gym that is there the same time I am every day and he runs on the treadmill. For the past two weeks he's been doing the same thing: sounds like he's trying to cough up a lung. On the treadmill. Not very smart.

    This time of year, if I saw that, I would assume it's allergies. Whenever the freakin' cottonwood trees start blooming, I'm a mess. Not sick, but you would think I was. Coughing and sneezing...

    I can NOT stop thinking about this in allergy season.

    k9ra8u0bfdai.jpg
  • xMrBunglex wrote: »
    My co-worker in the next cube is sick...she has been coughing up a lung for 2 days. I told her "You shouldn't be here, go home!" but she just shrugged. Why do some people insist on coming to work & pumping out the germs???

    (I don't want to be rude, but sorry, she's one of these quite large unhealthy people that will end up being sick for a month.)

    Maybe I'll turn it into a positive & call in sick on Monday and blame it on her! (Assuming I don't, you know, ACTUALLY GET SICK)

    A lot of businesses are doing this to themselves. For YEARS, everywhere I worked gave me XX vacation days to take when I want, plus X personal holidays to take when I want, and unlimited sick days (salary) so long as I didn't take advantage of it. I always took off when I was sick, got rested, and felt better more quickly.

    For the past 4-5 years, the companies I've worked for have changed to a PTO system. You are given XX PTO days, this encompasses sick days + vacation. I WILL NOT use my PTO for a sick day unless I'm practically on my death bed.

    Where I work, unless you have a doctor's note on the first day you call in, they use your PTO for the first 2 days you are sick. On the 3rd day it's actually considered sick time.

    You can also get with the on staff nurse and if you have a fever, she will recommend the sergeant on duty send you home and it gets counted as sick time for that first day.

    At the end of your time with the company, when you retire, you can take ALL the sick time you didn't use and get extra years towards your retirement.

    Sounds like you do the same thing my youngest son does. I won't say, but I'm pretty sure it's the same career. Oh, and I like your screen name. Very pretty and so is your profile pic!
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    pofoster21 wrote: »
    crosbylee wrote: »
    Talkradio wrote: »
    These last few days of being sad have been pretty revealing about my unhealthy relationship with food... I just want to eat until I don't feel anything but full. The lifelong habit of medicating with food is lurking around me. I didn't log the last couple of days, and I know I probably ate over maintenance, but I'm happy that I managed to avoid sitting on the couch and eating bags (plural...) of chips and cookies.

    Back on track today. Even if everything else is haywire, I am going to be kind to myself and not eat until I feel sick.

    This is something I am currently going through myself. My MIL is very ill and it looks like they may not be able to do anything for her. I am close to her as I lost my own mom when I was 26. So I am somewhat self medicating with food and trying to stop myself from doing that at the same time. I didn't log at all yesterday, but I am trying to do better today and deal with the emotions another.

    I am struggling with this myself over my horse. While that may not seem as sad and traumatic as a human this guy is the love of my life. I am just grateful I can spend some quality time with him in the last few weeks of his life. I am grazing him right now. But when I leave I will want to eat and drink to fill the sad places. Some days I resist. And some I don't then have that guilt and disgust with myself to deal with too. But I think we have to forgive ourselves and just keep moving forward. I do believe in the phrase that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

    Thanks @pofoster21, I understand how you feel about your big guy. I recently lost my youngest mastiff too. He was five years old. Our babies in their own way.

    I tear up just thinking that my cat turned 14 and probably doesn't have many years left. She's a pain in the butt but she's been with me since my divorce, and moved to the US with me. I've known her longer than my husband! And she's totally MY cat, always following me, waiting for me to go to bed etc. So yeah, I totally get it.
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    bkhamill wrote: »
    MoHousdon wrote: »
    Tomorrow I will be in training all day. This makes me sad for 3 reasons.

    1. I have no idea what we'll be served for lunch so I can't log it accurately.
    2. I won't be able to be on here at all.
    3. Since I do my HIIT at my office, I'll be missing tomorrow's workout.

    I am, however, looking forward to being out of the office for the day and getting paid for it, also...FREE LUNCH!!! B)

    Cute Avatar

    Thanks! It is pretty much my personality. I DON'T SHARE CAKE!

    Except with me, cuz we're zombie killin' partners... :D

    I feel the need for a real confession today. - I used to shoplift in high school. A LOT. I had a shoplifting partner and we would go together and keep an eye out for the other. I lifted everything, bikinis, movies (VHS, that's how old I am), clothes, makeup, purses, whatever. We got chased out of the mall by security once. We ran through the back hallways where the public isn't supposed to go and exited out some little side door. I never got caught. My partner did, later, after she moved to another state and got put in jail and charged with a felony. - Irony...I've been a cop for over 18 years now. But I can spot a shoplifter in a heartbeat LOL

    Ok this is totally awesome. Living proof that people change!
    Kalici wrote: »
    Francl27 wrote: »
    Today I had some delicious Ben & Jerry's ice cream after stopping in a bookstore. I didn't find the book I was looking for (Ancillary Sword), so I ended up going home and placing an online order for three books. Can't wait to check em out!

    ALSO, a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! All of my grades have come in, except for one I was never worried about, and I am officially graduating University!! Now I can hopefully get my butt in gear and focus more on this! So relieved.

    Congrats!!!
    ShibaEars wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    81Katz wrote: »
    Confession: I will use the same k-cup 2-3 times. lol

    Worst confession I've read here, ewwwwwww. I loathe weak coffee...I'm the one who likes the cup from the bottom of the french press that's practically strong enough to stand up on its own.

    But that leads to a confession that I do put a splash of cold water in my super-strong coffee to cool it down for maximum immediate gulbability, and that grosses most people out too.

    I am such a wuss with hot foods/drinks so sometimes if I want to drink my tea sooner I will add in an ice cube or two. Otherwise I have to wait like 15 minutes to be able to sip it.
    I love my coffee (tea, too, but to a lesser extent) to be piping hot. The second it cools down, gets lukewarm, it almost disgusts me. I can't bring myself to finish it sometimes. At least the kcups I use. The thing is, I like iced coffee a lot.

    I love hot food. But now it's sounding a lot less appetizing in the summery heat we've been getting.

    I have a very sensitive mouth. Just last week I had strips of skin falling off because I burned it yet again with a piece of pizza... I often just end up dropping an ice cube in my coffee when I order some somewhere, lol.

    Stressful morning today and I just gave up on making the kids school lunches. Got my husband to do it. So sick of never knowing what to make for my daughter and I know she won't eat it anyway. Gosh.

    And I have absolutely no idea what *I* want for lunch, so I guess I'm a bit of an hypocrite.

    Holy crap, I hope your mouth is okay now.

    You'd be surprised how fast mouth wounds heal. I'm used to it by now. I always burn it...

    Oh, wow - she's truly your life companion! I'd be in the same boat you are: always worried, but know it will happen sooner or later. You've given her quite a life though!

    I raised my baby (a cat) from the time I found her starving and abandoned at around 4 weeks old at a nursery I was working at. She was so small that I could hold her in the palm of my hand and she wouldn't dangle off of either side of my hand.

    She thought I was her mother and HATES everyone else--She'll claw and bite and scratch everyone except me. I can pretty much get away with anything with her. Fast forward three years later, when I was getting married and moving to another country...

    ...I paid around 3000 U.S. dollars to bring her from Oman (my birth country) to Saudi Arabia. After paying the huge amount and bringing her, we found out that my husband is horribly allergic to cats. He almost literally becomes comatose around them--he can't function at all from the crazy-bad reaction he gets. I cried so much about having to give her up for adoption at that point--and instead of agreeing to giving her up for adoption, he offered to let me pay ANOTHER 2000+ USD just so I could send her back to my sister, so I wouldn't have to give her up.

    In other news, I have a seriously awesome husband. ;) I still miss my baby, though. :'(

    That is truly an amazing story! I'm so sorry you miss her, but what a wonderful thing you and your husband have done to save the life of a helpless animal.
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    xMrBunglex wrote: »
    My co-worker in the next cube is sick...she has been coughing up a lung for 2 days. I told her "You shouldn't be here, go home!" but she just shrugged. Why do some people insist on coming to work & pumping out the germs???

    (I don't want to be rude, but sorry, she's one of these quite large unhealthy people that will end up being sick for a month.)

    Maybe I'll turn it into a positive & call in sick on Monday and blame it on her! (Assuming I don't, you know, ACTUALLY GET SICK)

    There's a guy at my gym that is there the same time I am every day and he runs on the treadmill. For the past two weeks he's been doing the same thing: sounds like he's trying to cough up a lung. On the treadmill. Not very smart.

    This time of year, if I saw that, I would assume it's allergies. Whenever the freakin' cottonwood trees start blooming, I'm a mess. Not sick, but you would think I was. Coughing and sneezing...

    I can NOT stop thinking about this in allergy season.

    k9ra8u0bfdai.jpg

    Exactly mine and my daughter's thoughts right now. (Well, mostly mine, since my almost 3 year old doesn't understand all that...)

    On a completely unrelated topic, I got way too excited yesterday when I found the library at school actually had Frozen on the shelf. Librarian said lots of parents there rent kid's movies as "babysitters" so they can study or do homework, so they keep a supply. Let's just say, Frozen has been on constant loop all morning and I've been able to actually study uninterrupted. Bad mommy....lol
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    xMrBunglex wrote: »
    My co-worker in the next cube is sick...she has been coughing up a lung for 2 days. I told her "You shouldn't be here, go home!" but she just shrugged. Why do some people insist on coming to work & pumping out the germs???

    (I don't want to be rude, but sorry, she's one of these quite large unhealthy people that will end up being sick for a month.)

    Maybe I'll turn it into a positive & call in sick on Monday and blame it on her! (Assuming I don't, you know, ACTUALLY GET SICK)

    A lot of businesses are doing this to themselves. For YEARS, everywhere I worked gave me XX vacation days to take when I want, plus X personal holidays to take when I want, and unlimited sick days (salary) so long as I didn't take advantage of it. I always took off when I was sick, got rested, and felt better more quickly.

    For the past 4-5 years, the companies I've worked for have changed to a PTO system. You are given XX PTO days, this encompasses sick days + vacation. I WILL NOT use my PTO for a sick day unless I'm practically on my death bed.

    Where I work, unless you have a doctor's note on the first day you call in, they use your PTO for the first 2 days you are sick. On the 3rd day it's actually considered sick time.

    You can also get with the on staff nurse and if you have a fever, she will recommend the sergeant on duty send you home and it gets counted as sick time for that first day.

    At the end of your time with the company, when you retire, you can take ALL the sick time you didn't use and get extra years towards your retirement.

    Sounds like you do the same thing my youngest son does. I won't say, but I'm pretty sure it's the same career. Oh, and I like your screen name. Very pretty and so is your profile pic!

    The screen name was an idea from my Aunt Lois before she passed away from breast cancer. Cancer is very prevalent in my family, so the company I work for is focused on a cause that is close to my heart. :smile:

    Thank you. :blush: I admire your arms. I hope mine can look like yours someday. :smiley:
  • I spent 45 minutes putting together a report on a meeting we had yesterday afternoon (3 hour meeting), I cannot wait until this topic is dead.
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    I hit the 35lb pound loss mark today and I am thinking about celebrating with nachos and cheese!

    Great job! Not to be all preachy, but maybe celebrate with something non-food related, too? I mean, enjoy your nachos for sure. Just add in something else so that your mind starts to relate health and weight loss to other good things, too. JMHO.

    I absolutely hear what you are saying :) Maybe a long hot bubble bath or a new book!!
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    I hit the 35lb pound loss mark today and I am thinking about celebrating with nachos and cheese!

    Great job! Not to be all preachy, but maybe celebrate with something non-food related, too? I mean, enjoy your nachos for sure. Just add in something else so that your mind starts to relate health and weight loss to other good things, too. JMHO.

    I absolutely hear what you are saying :) Maybe a long hot bubble bath or a new book!!

    OOH! I do a bubble bath after I have worked a 16 hour shift and STILL got my workout in. Best reward ever! :grin:
  • BZAH10 wrote: »
    I hit the 35lb pound loss mark today and I am thinking about celebrating with nachos and cheese!

    Great job! Not to be all preachy, but maybe celebrate with something non-food related, too? I mean, enjoy your nachos for sure. Just add in something else so that your mind starts to relate health and weight loss to other good things, too. JMHO.

    I absolutely hear what you are saying :) Maybe a long hot bubble bath or a new book!!

    OOH! I do a bubble bath after I have worked a 16 hour shift and STILL got my workout in. Best reward ever! :grin:

    That amazing! Not sure I could do a 16 hour shift lol
  • I try not to think about my pets passing away. But that 'denial' made the death of my dog hit me like a ton of bricks and it still upsets me when I think about it.
    Pets ARE like children. I love mine so much it's ridiculous. ;)
  • Unknown
    edited May 2015
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    xMrBunglex wrote: »
    My co-worker in the next cube is sick...she has been coughing up a lung for 2 days. I told her "You shouldn't be here, go home!" but she just shrugged. Why do some people insist on coming to work & pumping out the germs???

    (I don't want to be rude, but sorry, she's one of these quite large unhealthy people that will end up being sick for a month.)

    Maybe I'll turn it into a positive & call in sick on Monday and blame it on her! (Assuming I don't, you know, ACTUALLY GET SICK)

    There's a guy at my gym that is there the same time I am every day and he runs on the treadmill. For the past two weeks he's been doing the same thing: sounds like he's trying to cough up a lung. On the treadmill. Not very smart.

    This time of year, if I saw that, I would assume it's allergies. Whenever the freakin' cottonwood trees start blooming, I'm a mess. Not sick, but you would think I was. Coughing and sneezing...

    I can NOT stop thinking about this in allergy season.

    k9ra8u0bfdai.jpg

    Exactly mine and my daughter's thoughts right now. (Well, mostly mine, since my almost 3 year old doesn't understand all that...)

    On a completely unrelated topic, I got way too excited yesterday when I found the library at school actually had Frozen on the shelf. Librarian said lots of parents there rent kid's movies as "babysitters" so they can study or do homework, so they keep a supply. Let's just say, Frozen has been on constant loop all morning and I've been able to actually study uninterrupted. Bad mommy....lol

    Well, there are worse babysitters... On that note, I could probably still quote "The Lion King" from beginning to end with or without the movie... We actually wore out the VHS and I bought it again. My daughter and I went and saw it in the theatre a couple years ago when it came to IMAX in 3-D. Still knew all the words...